“I’ve booked us a table at M+H club. See you there at 7”. I read the text feeling positively surprised; he’s chosen well and I’m overcome with a sense of relief. I can see it now: I’ll walk in to see the bar staff buzzing around him, tending to his every need. He’ll be wearing a crisp blue suit waiting to greet me with a glass of pinot noir. Oh well, this dating blog malarkey was nice while it lasted.
I walk in. I’m greeted by an enthusiastic guy at reception who asks me who I’m here to see. “Dave”, I say a little too quickly . “Dave who?”, he asks. I take more than a few seconds before responding because I actually don’t know. He gives me the ‘on-a-date-are-we’ wink face and leads me through some plush curtains into the main bar. OMG. It is pitch black in here. Hang on, did I get the venue wrong, am I in that restaurant run by blind waiters? Or maybe this is a secret sex dungeon. I’m really not prepared for this, neither mentally nor physically.
I suddenly notice a silhouette in the corner thanks to the flicker of a tea light. “Hi, I’m Dave”. “Hello?”, I say expecting to hear my echo. No sign of over-attentive bar staff. No pinot noir waiting for me. Is that a suit? Maybe. But he could be wearing a onesie for all I know.
We make niceties for an hour. He’s actually quite charming. Although throughout I’m having thoughts of using my iPhone flash light as a torch. I just want to know what he looks like. Does the gravelly voice match the face? Is he wearing lip balm? Are his eyebrows better than mine?
He tells me according to a dating guide he read (wtf??) we shouldn’t talk for more than 90 minutes on a first date. Fan-f***ing tastic! We grab our stuff and slowly make it back to the curtained entrance. Ahh LIGHT my friend, so good to see you! I turn back to see if Dave has made it and … Ohh. It suddenly becomes so very clear why we just spent the last hour in darkness.
Lesson learnt: if you get taken to a poorly lit cave on a first date, expect a face fit for radio. #harsh #truth
I am,
Still SeekingChuckBass
xoxo
seeking chuck bass 